:: Electric Psychedelic Pussycat Swinger's Club ::

:: Friday, March 14, 2003 ::

i can barely see

I am faded.

I am seriously faded.

It's 4:15am, eastern standard time and i can barely see what's in front of me. It was steve's birthday tonight. He finally turned 26.

Wow.

We are getting old.

I'm surprised i can even type right now. We went to 8 different place in one night! Without a doubt, that's a new record. Sorry if i sound somewhat incoherent. But for some strange reason i feel compelled to write. It's so windy outside. We started off at Joya - a thai restaurant in brooklyn heights. Jess, Amy, Naughty, Pete, Neeti, Arnold, Andy, and Steve, were all in attendance. 3 bottles of wine and a round of hefeweizen. From that point forward it was guys night out. Next up: Lush. A round of beer for everyone. Then we cruise over to Tribe - a hip hop joint in the village. Nobody there except the cute waitress, who kept imploring us to stay for a few rounds. Alright, it's time for XVI in the east village. Nada. Bar None? Nothin' goin' on but the rent. So we end up at McSorley's for a couple of rounds of microbrew. Some fool suggested we pound 'em. (I know at this point that i'm in for a long night.) Hmm... OK, we've arrived at Bar 13 in union square. A few rounds of scotch to the tune of 80's music and we're feelin' good. Somehow me & steve ended up doing the white-man shuffle here to the tune of Depeche, Billy Idol, and Wham (i swear, i'm not gay. but my boyfriend is. i'm kidding! seriously though, i'm not gay.)

JUH-JUH-JUH...JITTERBUG!

Next up: The Tiki Room. I secretly inform the bartender that we had a couple of birthday boys and asked if she could make their drinks on the stronger side. Next thing you know, me and Arnold are witnessing a guiness world record being made before our very eyes. I have never seen someone pour as much hard liquor into a long island as this bartender was doing. I almost felt sorry for the unsuspecting bastards. Next thing you know, everybody starts armwrestling (what genius suggested this!?). How the hell did we end up arm-wrasslin'? At this point it had become fairly obvious to me that we were all inebriated. Why is it that when a bunch of dudes roll out and drink heavily, we end up doin' some primitive ritual to prove who the alpha male is? I am the Finally, we end up at Blue - a korean joint on 34th. I can't believe we ended up at a korean joint. BOOO!!! But we were all hungry so those are the breaks. We ended up gettin 2 rounds of regular soju and five rounds of yogurt soju. In addition, we ordered up some chicken drumsticks and korean-style sweet and sour pork.

The five of us piled into one cab and managed to find our way home. Somehow. I'll probably wake up tomorrow with a splitting headache and some major five-o'clock shadow, and i'll probably regret drinking as much as i did ("...once it hits your lips it's soooo goooood"). I'm sure i won't even remember writing any of this (did any of this even make sense?). But bottom line: i did my job. Steve's at a "9" on his 26th and that makes me feel like i've performed my birthday obligations without a hitch. Happy birthday, buddy.

Now if you'll excuse me, i have a date with a porcelain bowl and the cold, hard, ground.

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